When you hit certain milestones such as getting engaged or married, it’s an exciting time where you want to celebrate your success with the people closest to you. This past weekend, I attended a gorgeous wedding in Downtown Los Angeles and sat in on the wedding ceremony. One thing the Deacon said that stood out to me was “complement, not complete each other”. Hmm.. that’s interesting because I’m sure that that most of you have been told to find someone that completes you, but he explained that marriage should be two people that strengthen each other as individuals, not two people that become one. Here are my thoughts on who completes you and who compliments you.

Complete

  • Supplementing one person’s strengths with another
  • You’re needy- you need each other to accomplish things
  • You’re constantly fighting and don’t always agree because of different viewpoints
  • You’re opposites and can compromise, but maybe not willingly
  • Significant other may criticize what you do instead of helping you

Complement:

  • Make each other into a better person; someone who can improve you and adds to the relationship
  • Encourage each other to pursue individual hobbies and passions
  • Team up together to accomplish tasks
  • Both agree on the same values and have similar mindsets
  • The physical and mental chemistry are both there
  • With fighting, bickering and joking, you still love each other at the end of the day
  • You don’t run out of conversation

I agree… we should be finding someone that complements us. This person will be the one to encourage you, to accomplish tasks with you, and is excited to create a future with you. With someone who completes you, we’re implying that we’re missing something. While you may be the case, think about if this person helps achieve success or just does it themselves thinking that you can’t.

Looking at your own relationship, are you settling for someone that is opposite because they challenge you or are you in a partnership with someone who challenges you because they want to help make you better (in a good way)? These are important traits to think about while finding your Peanut Butter and the #onethatsticks!

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